Some days I pull one card from my tarot deck(s), some days I pull multiples just because I feel the tug too, then occasionally I become bold, light incense or candles, throw on some meditative themed music and go to town. On top of everything that has been going on this week (we're only two days in...) and last week, I've done such a thing; I found, and or made the time to sit down with my cards to see if I was ready to, I don't know, walk with my deities.
This has been an on going fancy of mine, and I suppose for most practicing witches, we all want to make altars to someone, to represent them, call on them for aid and guidance, in those dark places when we're alone or want that extra kick to our spells. I'm the last person who should be talking about spell work, but I do feel I can talk a little about my journey thus far. Besides, keeping track of the lot of this is really for me anyways (though of course i'm always going to hope it appeals to someone else).
So yes, this past week that lead into Monday is where I'm at now, trying to figure out of deities work is right for me, or if I'm even ready for them. Well, leave it the cards to tell you what they think you need to know, not what you want to hear, which I kinda wish was the case this time. While I've gathered it's a, you're not ready yet kind of answer, I know they cannot be far, not with the dream that cause me to pull the cards in the first place.
The picture above is what my bed wound up looking liked Monday morning, tarot, oracles, incense and crystals abound. It had started out as a three card draw. One from each of the three decks I've been working with lately. Two of them were created by lovely Instagram users mysticmoons_tarot and her lovely moon_phases_oracle along with thymewitch and her tarotinthyme oracle. There's something about the love and energy that goes into these, something so different then picking up a deck in the store, and while I don't want to get too involved at the moment, I've had the privilege of following them and their journeys through creating them and I think that's where a lot of the magic is to begin with. More and more I find myself wanting to create my own.
It's not the clearest picture as the lighting in my room is terrible, it was still something I needed, to catch the moment and to keep to journal about later, plus, now I get to employ it in this blog. Anyways, the first three cards I pulled were the Seven of Swords, Time and the Storm Moon. I think me and swords have a love hate relationship, and while I feel like a lot of people might, they pop up a lot for me, and the Five of Swords is pretty much my signifier card.
This is already getting to be long winded and I don't know if anyone really wants all the meanings of the cards, so here's the gist... The seven is like the anti-hero, where you might be the bad guy, but your reasons, your end game, might be for the greater good. Like stealing bread so you don't starve, so someone else doesn't starve, etc. Time is exactly what it sounds like, do I have the time to invest in my current journey, because if I don't I probably shouldn't start as this period could be exhausting, though if I do, if i continue and fight, the moon will always shine through the storm and I could emerge as something more.
Time, with my current moods lately, my depression and work in general, is not something I seem to have much of, and if I do, I make poor use of it. That brought in the next card and here we have swords again, this time the two and it is telling me this is a conflict of the mind and the heart, that it's time to pause and take inventory and find a way through the struggle (the storm moon again). The Two of Swords is absolutely true though, this is a struggle of the mind and the heart, because I know with all my heart I want to let the divine in, I've always wanted some powerhouse at my back, someone or something to turn to when I need guidance or feel lost. I often feel alone in this world and my spirit, my soul, it always tends to feel like something is missing.
The King of Coins is all about ordered stability, he's not about taking risks or going with innovations, he's old fashioned and lets common sense rule the day. However, he is the kind that if he puts his mind to something he is a powerful ally and whatever he puts his mind to will grow and flourish. I'm pretty sure he's saying that now might not be the time to take that innovative risk, while the Christmas moon, the last card I pulled, is saying that while things are coming to an end, something beautiful is beginning, that these are precious minutes...
I'm tempted to say long story short, but we're past that, I'm past that. Overall, I don't think this is the time for deity work, that I'm still in the process of healing, healing myself. I won't say that was this past years theme, because I didn't realize that's what I was doing until late in the year. I'm constantly being reminded of things from the past that completely throw me off, like a jouster being knocked of their horse and being splintered and bruised and broken, and that's just daily, that's not the anger or jealously that's built up of late, or not having the right kind of people to talk to about any of it.
I'm not sure how to end this on a positive note, but I guess knowing I have to keep fighting, keep healing isn't necessarily a bad thing either.
(credit to the artist)
I love this!!!!!!!
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